CF RELATED - Losing a patient

[mcbrash]

This past Thursday I attended a memorial service for patients with CF that had passed on including my son Matt. While talking to Matt's Dr. she said that these memorials are done, not just for the families but also for the staff of the ward/clinic. Although the pain of losing a loved one is the worst pain we will ever have to suffer in our lives, sometimes I guess we don't think of the wonderful staff that take such good care of our children/husbands/wives etc. After taking care of the patients for such a long time, no matter what, the majority of staff do get close to them and form friendships. I'm sure we have all said, at one time or another, "They must see this all the time and try not to get involved on a personal level with their patients" ..........I do not think this way at all anymore, that's for sure. After sitting behind some of Matt's nurses and witnessing the tears they were shedding, I realize that these people truly are such special people, losing not just one patient but many that they have become close to over the years.

My sincere thanks to each and every staff member of CF teams everywhere.

Sandy

 

[JazzysMom]

The staff (doctors office & hospital) & I have shared some tears over our losses. For my clinic many of the staff have been with me thru many,many years as they have with other patients. They know our families, our lives & are part of our extended family. It would be impossible for them not to feel the loss. I think quite often we get wrapped up in our own grief that we forget that it does extend beyond where we think it goes!

 

[anonymous]

I go to what they call A Celebration of Life each year for the CF chapter I live in. I started going 12 years ago when my child was 9 years old. I went because a Mum I had meet at clinic appt's and in hospital had lost her son and I wanted to show my support. My husband found it strange that I wanted to go and some people (some assoc with CF and others not) also have said they felt it a bit morbid and unecessary. I am so glad I went.. I haven't missed it since and now my Mum, sisters and friend come with me. I know if it something we have to face..It will help knowing these people are around. I was surpised at the Dr's, nurses, physios in particular who come along to support and remember. Usually people are sent an invitation and a note to provide the name of anyone they want mentioned. it is a beautiful atmosphere with roses and candles and usually we take a balloon and all let it go together. When I let two go last year, I felt a squeeze on my shoulder and the CF Nurse was there for me and she also was shedding tears. She has experienced much more than I have and she gave up her Sunday to attend. We lost a very special boy in 2003. The hosp held a memorial before his body was sent to his home town. It was incredibly sad, funny, special with so many stories from the staff who then sat and comforted all the kids.(kids who were wondering what the point was of looking after themselves..not knowing when it was going to happen to them.. The nurses heard this special boy say to his brother.. Im not going to die am I< I don't want to die. Sadly he died the following day. Some of the staff would have gone home to tuck their own children in..now that's got to be difficult.
We regard footballl players, singers, actresses as special special. I think they are doing jobs they love for absurd amounts of money (even Angelina says that herself) Soccer players are getting paid $90 000 per week to play a game they would play for nothing cos they love it and they will never be able to spend the money the earn (Beckham), There was a dr on tele tonight who went overseas and bought a badly burned boy back. He operated and has made an enormous difference and this dr wants nothing for it. I know more people would'nt be able to look at the little boy and listen to the dr but millions will tune in to watch someone kick a ball into a net and have huge respect for him and think he deserves the ridiculous amounts of money!!!
x N

 

[julie]

I use to work on an oncology ward in San Diego. The memorials that we put together for our patients, and invited their friends and family were helpful to all of us staff members who had developed such close relationships with the many patients we came to know. We would just sit there and remember the funny things they said or did, share some little secret with their family.... such fond membories and it brought such closure to someone we had known at "work" but had become so much more than just a job.

I'm glad you were able to be part of a memorial for your son and to hear the wonderful things they had to say about him!

 

[JennifersHope]

Hi Sandy,

I was just peeking through the off topic subjects and I came across Matts video montage. Gosh is that amazing... For some reason that really hit me so hard. I guess because he looked like he was so full of life and so healthy.

I think it is awesome that he had such great nurses, as well he should have. I being a nurse and a patient know how valuable a nurse can be if they are sensitive to what is going on with the patient.

I hope I can be half as good as the nurses that Matt had.

I think you are amazing in all that you are doing in honor of Matt. I would love to see the link to his carepages website.

Love,

Jennifer

 

[anonymous]

Hi Jennifer

Thankyou so much for those kind words, reading messages like this just warms my heart knowing how much people care.

If you go to www.carepages.com, sign in and Matt's carepage name is Mattsupdatepage.

I can tell Jennifer, that you are just as sensitive and compassionate as Matt's nurses, one who's patients always look forward to being on duty.

Take care

Sandy