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Im sure many of us have them! SO SHARE! I guess you can call this The fart maker's anonamous <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif" border="0">
Given the title of this thread, I hope people know it's bound to get pretty gross.
My worst fart stories are always the ones where I expect a fart and end up with something a little less clean and dry than I expected. Then you have the embarassment of going to the bathroom to clean it up, fast enough so that you can clean as much as possible... and slow enough that people don't make the connection (fart and immediately afterwards, running to the bathroom). Then you have to worry about stained underwear or pants. And if you're out, and you don't have a spare pair of underwear/pants, well then that's just gross. It doesn't feel too spectacular either. Haha.
my boyfriend was going down on me and i accidently farted... talk about embarrasing, i wanted to run and hide, but it is really no big deal, @#$# happens right...needless to say, we are not together anymore, and believe me, the farting had nothing to do with it either!!!!!!!!!!!
Well I have a couple of spectacular ones to report. Both of my truly momentous ones were when I was pregnant. Believe me...there is NOTHING in the world as toxic as a PREGNANT CF fart! WOAH!The first, we were in the grocery store and I just had to let it go. John was completely gassed and we just ran as fast as we could to another isle. It was horrible. I'm surprised he didn't drive off and leave me there to deal with the offended shoppers. The other, we were in bed and I was like 9 1/2 months pregnant and HUGE. I was struggling to turn over and in my effort I ripped off the loudest one ever in my life. Most of mine are silent but horrific (deadly is not a good enough word - mine are toxic enough to disfigure someone or something close by). Anyway, it was terrible and after the laughter over the sound died down, we fought over whether we should trap the smell under the covers and risk what it would be like in the morning (stale farts - EW!) or if we should just fan it out and take our chances. Of course, that is a "fight" we have often. What was even funnier about that one was that we were living with my dad and in the morning we had to explain the riotous midnight laughter.
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