Fresh Start

[lightNlife]

Okay okay okay. This has gotten to the point of being crazy. Before
we take another step on this wretched path that seems to be strewn
with eggshells, can we please drop the issue from the CF carriers
post.<br>
<br>
<br>
Plenty of hot buttons were pushed on all sides, and just about
everyone has gotten their dander up. Can we all act like reasonable
adults now and move on? We can't take back our words, but we can at
least put the pitchforks and torches down.<br>
<br>
I prefer to spend my energy keeping up with my neb treatments,
working hard at my job, being a good wife to my husband and a good
caregiver to my fish, rather than waste it on responding to a post
about how I may have misspelled something.<br>
<br>
We're all in the same boat here, let's not fight over who get to
hold the oars.<br>
<br>
Amicably,<br>
Lauren<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>

 

[Emily65Roses]

These happen from time to time, no matter what you do. And someone always starts a peace thread in response. We all agree on it, say it's a good idea... and a little while later, it happens again. Again, nothing you can do about it.

It's a good idea, and certainly you say many things I agree with. Unfortunately, you can't expect the hostility to disappear on certain "hot topics." Tis human nature. I'm not saying it's okay or "hey, it happens, oh well." Just that I don't see any giant band aids for the whole situation now or anywhere in the near future.

 

[thelizardqueen]

Ditto on what Emily said. We're going to clash with people because we have differnces of opinions. Nothing we can do about it, and it'll always be like that. That being said - I take nothing personal from these heated topics. I take things with a grain of salt.

 

[NoExcuses]

i think it is a faulty trait of the female gender to cower away from conflict. it's not across the board with all females, but it definitely seems much more common than with the other gender.

so you disagree with someone? big deal. so someone thinks what you said is wrong? who cares.

i'm not a big fan of cowards who shy away from conflict. what's the point of having an opinion if you're too scared to state it? who cares if every other person on the planet disagrees with you. it doesn't make your opinion invalid.

i respect people who have opinions that are 180 from my but have the courage to speak up and state their opinion. i have little respect for those who share my opinions but hide their opinions in the shadows because they're afraid of who might comment on what they have to say.

I think backbones are highly underrated.

 

[thelizardqueen]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>

i think it is a faulty trait of the female gender to cower away from conflict.</end quote></div>

Not I said the fly.<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif" border="0">

Like my quote says: 'Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes'

 

[Ender]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>

i think it is a faulty trait of the female gender to cower away from conflict. it's not across the board with all females, but it definitely seems much more common than with the other gender.



so you disagree with someone? big deal. so someone thinks what you said is wrong? who cares.



i'm not a big fan of cowards who shy away from conflict. what's the point of having an opinion if you're too scared to state it? who cares if every other person on the planet disagrees with you. it doesn't make your opinion invalid.



i respect people who have opinions that are 180 from my but have the courage to speak up and state their opinion. i have little respect for those who share my opinions but hide their opinions in the shadows because they're afraid of who might comment on what they have to say.



I think backbones are highly underrated.</end quote></div>


I think they can get you into trouble as well <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif" border="0">

 

[anonymous]

maybe it's just me...but I am also one that feels like we are all entitled to our opinions...and we should not get our feelings hurt if we have a conflicting belief...that being said...i do think what is being left out of these "heated" conversations...is a common sense of decency and maturity...this forum would be much better off if everyone just used a little "tact" from time to time...if you have to "apologize" for stating your opinion...that is probably a pretty good clue that you are going about it the wrong way...life is too short to get hung up on all this drama...this is a "support" forum...not a debate...

 

[julie]

Ok, I wasn't going to post but I changed my mind... Lgrace, I think it's nice that you started a new post. I didn't see all of your posts on the other topic, just one that was quoted in somoene elses thread. I don't agree with your opinion, and that's ok, but I personally took it as you were judging chantel for her question... and her question had NOTHING to do with marriage and having a baby; rather she was asking about carriers and CFers having kids and what options were.

Just my two cents, if you want to feel better about the situation, maybe you ought to apologize to chantel. Not for your beliefs, but for HOW you shared them. Just an idea, I may be out of line in saying/suggesting that, but I know when I've crossed the line on this forum before (and I have, so I'm not judging you at all) that a personal PM apologizing has always helped me.

And I agree with Em, this happens a lot. It's unfortunate, but it does happen. Opinions differ, but we all need to remember it's how we come across that makes a difference. I don't think anyone comes here to be lectured or told they are a bad person for their personal beliefs/opinions, so continue to share your's but just remember to try to not make the other person "wrong" or "the bad one" in the process. And I saw that grammatical post you just referred to, shame on that person for their comment to you.

Amy...you post one thing, but it seems like you consistently act in another way. What I mean is that you say "you disagree with someone? big deal..." but then when people do disagree with you, you spend the remainder of the day or the post continually sharing YOUR opinion with them, thus frustrating them and a majority of other posters on this forum AND you take away from the inital topic. People can read. They don't need YOUR opinion continually shoved down their throat. You need to live by your own words. If you disagree with someone, post your opinion and then LEAVE IT. Quit coming back and telling them how wrong they are and how right you are and why you are right. Just leave it. This goes for stuff like the CF carriers post today and for other things like Cf medications, hospitalizations and so on. I know that you are a pharmacutical rep and I really appreciate a lot of the insight you offer and new posts you make about various things related to your job. However, it doesn't make you the only expert on the subject matter.

I'll probaby get it for this post, and that's not my intention but just knowing how this board functions.... I'm not afraid to share my opinion though. So there it is

 

[icefisherman]

kinda sounds like this turned into what lauren was talking about.

 

[anonymous]

Hi there,
First off I am new to these boards. I started out researching someplace to go to find support to get by the hard times CF hands us, our children, our friends. I thought that my son (w/cf) who is 13yrs old and awaiting a double lung transplant could gain support by meeting people who have to face the same daily challenges he does.

So after plenty of reading together, learning a couple of things along the way and saying alot of prayers for people we have decided that we need a more POSITVE support tool. He has gone over the teens & tranplant threads, me obviously the adult conversations. Unfortunately they just seemed to harp on how bad life is, we know life can be unfair but truly, there has to be some bright side of living until transplant! If he doesn't make it there, hey, he had enjoyed life, OK maybe life with some adjustments but living was FUN!

This is only my opinion which I have chosen to share with some of you...CF is something that my son unfortunately has, it certainly is NOT WHO HE IS!!!

I truly wish health and happiness to everyone.

 

[anonymous]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>


so you disagree with someone? big deal. so someone thinks what you said is wrong? who cares.

</end quote></div>

You care, for one, because anytime anyone disagrees with you or calls you on something you argue until the cows come in trying to prove your point.

 

[JazzysMom]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>anonymous</b></i>

Hi there,

First off I am new to these boards. I started out researching someplace to go to find support to get by the hard times CF hands us, our children, our friends. I thought that my son (w/cf) who is 13yrs old and awaiting a double lung transplant could gain support by meeting people who have to face the same daily challenges he does.



So after plenty of reading together, learning a couple of things along the way and saying alot of prayers for people we have decided that we need a more POSITVE support tool. He has gone over the teens & tranplant threads, me obviously the adult conversations. Unfortunately they just seemed to harp on how bad life is, we know life can be unfair but truly, there has to be some bright side of living until transplant! If he doesn't make it there, hey, he had enjoyed life, OK maybe life with some adjustments but living was FUN!



This is only my opinion which I have chosen to share with some of you...CF is something that my son unfortunately has, it certainly is NOT WHO HE IS!!!



I truly wish health and happiness to everyone.</end quote></div>


I am saddened to hear that we cant/dont offer what you are looking for. Some people will dispute your thoughts or at least give their opinons on them. I frequent one other forum on a regular basis, but I still come back here. I wish you luck in finding somewhere that gives you more of what you are looking for. Please remember tho that if you change your mind about here or just want to check in & see if things remain the same (they often change btw) that you are more than welcome!

 

[anonymous]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>JazzysMom</b></i>

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>anonymous</b></i>



Hi there,



First off I am new to these boards. I started out researching someplace to go to find support to get by the hard times CF hands us, our children, our friends. I thought that my son (w/cf) who is 13yrs old and awaiting a double lung transplant could gain support by meeting people who have to face the same daily challenges he does.



So after plenty of reading together, learning a couple of things along the way and saying alot of prayers for people we have decided that we need a more POSITVE support tool. He has gone over the teens & tranplant threads, me obviously the adult conversations. Unfortunately they just seemed to harp on how bad life is, we know life can be unfair but truly, there has to be some bright side of living until transplant! If he doesn't make it there, hey, he had enjoyed life, OK maybe life with some adjustments but living was FUN!



This is only my opinion which I have chosen to share with some of you...CF is something that my son unfortunately has, it certainly is NOT WHO HE IS!!!



I truly wish health and happiness to everyone.</end quote></div>



I am saddened to hear that we cant/dont offer what you are looking for. Some people will dispute your thoughts or at least give their opinons on them. I frequent one other forum on a regular basis, but I still come back here. I wish you luck in finding somewhere that gives you more of what you are looking for. Please remember tho that if you change your mind about here or just want to check in & see if things remain the same (they often change btw) that you are more than welcome!</end quote></div>


I m looking for other cf forums. Could you please Melissa share the link to the other one that you frequent?

 

[NoExcuses]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>julie</b></i>




Amy...you post one thing, but it seems like you consistently act in another way. What I mean is that you say "you disagree with someone? big deal..." but then when people do disagree with you, you spend the remainder of the day or the post continually sharing YOUR opinion with them, thus frustrating them and a majority of other posters on this forum AND you take away from the inital topic. People can read. They don't need YOUR opinion continually shoved down their throat. You need to live by your own words. If you disagree with someone, post your opinion and then LEAVE IT. Quit coming back and telling them how wrong they are and how right you are and why you are right. Just leave it. This goes for stuff like the CF carriers post today and for other things like Cf medications, hospitalizations and so on. I know that you are a pharmacutical rep and I really appreciate a lot of the insight you offer and new posts you make about various things related to your job. However, it doesn't make you the only expert on the subject matter.

</end quote></div>

1. what i meant by who cares was not getting intimidated by people. people apologizing for their opinions. or withdrawing their posts. THAT'S what i meant by "who cares."

2. who do you think you are telling me how often i can post and what i can say? you've got to be kidding me.

3. i will take my own advice and not be intimidated by others who disagree and i will post as often as i see fit.

4. the majority of my knowledge has nothing to do with my profession. it has to do with own personal research and education on my disease, my drugs and the medical field.

 

[NoExcuses]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>anonymous</b></i>

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>





so you disagree with someone? big deal. so someone thinks what you said is wrong? who cares.



</end quote></div>



You care, for one, because anytime anyone disagrees with you or calls you on something you argue until the cows come in trying to prove your point.</end quote></div>

at least i have the guts to post under a name. got courage?

 

[anonymous]

Thank you very much Melissa. I will stop by and check in because I only know all too well what day to day challenges we all face. I truly don't think everything is always happy, happy but I try very hard to find the up side to everything, whether it be for my son (w/cf) or two daughters (no/cf).

If you wouldn't mind sharing the other forum you frequent that would be wonderful.

 

[JazzysMom]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>anonymous</b></i>

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>JazzysMom</b></i>

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>anonymous</b></i>


Hi there,

First off I am new to these boards. I started out researching someplace to go to find support to get by the hard times CF hands us, our children, our friends. I thought that my son (w/cf) who is 13yrs old and awaiting a double lung transplant could gain support by meeting people who have to face the same daily challenges he does.

So after plenty of reading together, learning a couple of things along the way and saying alot of prayers for people we have decided that we need a more POSITVE support tool. He has gone over the teens & tranplant threads, me obviously the adult conversations. Unfortunately they just seemed to harp on how bad life is, we know life can be unfair but truly, there has to be some bright side of living until transplant! If he doesn't make it there, hey, he had enjoyed life, OK maybe life with some adjustments but living was FUN!

This is only my opinion which I have chosen to share with some of you...CF is something that my son unfortunately has, it certainly is NOT WHO HE IS!!!

I truly wish health and happiness to everyone.</end quote></div>

I am saddened to hear that we cant/dont offer what you are looking for. Some people will dispute your thoughts or at least give their opinons on them. I frequent one other forum on a regular basis, but I still come back here. I wish you luck in finding somewhere that gives you more of what you are looking for. Please remember tho that if you change your mind about here or just want to check in & see if things remain the same (they often change btw) that you are more than welcome!</end quote></div>


I m looking for other cf forums. Could you please Melissa share the link to the other one that you frequent?</end quote></div>

Here is the one I frequent more as quite a few people from here do:
<a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://groups.msn.com/CysticFibrosis2chat/everydaychattimes.msnw
">http://groups.msn.com/CysticFi...verydaychattimes.msnw
</a>
Here is another that I havent quite got use to the format yet so I dont use as often:
<a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://cf-talk.invisionzone.com/
">http://cf-talk.invisionzone.com/
</a>

 

[anonymous]

Thank you very much.

 

[65rosessamurai]

Amy,
Contrary to what you say, there is inconsistency to it. And, I disagree with your statement "...it is a faulty trait of the female gender to cowar away from conflict."
I found through my experience a large number of the female gender will actually start the conflict.
One good example to how you "share your opinion", which may not be here anymore, is in reference to my post "Excape from CareBear Land" (Which I even found was eventually locked after I made my final statement before staying away longer to detach), to which I was making a point in regards to seeing too much negativity on the boards.
As my opinion, which I think many had agreed, you had made posts towards me, which strayed from my topic, and with my explanation (and I think I put an apology for something), you still antagonized me with your posts until I was fed up with it. Despite my Gentleman-like attitude, you still hounded me, and ignored any such questions I made for you, to which I was trying to attempt a little peace, and to indicate that I was not ignoring any of your statements.
The start of it all was that my opinion to a sabatacle, and your opinion were different, yet you continued to antagonize me with your opinion of a sabatacle, not accepting my measurement of one. Thus, I totally agree with Julie's statement, since I was once the recieving end of your "opinion".
Another thing, I think you should be a little more "user friendly" to those "cowards" who want to share their opinion, because the method to which you give your opinion would certainly stop them from wanting to do it again.
I seem to be learning how this board functions, as well.

 

[anonymous]

Amy and Julie. Wow ladies.