CFer depressed!!!!

[anonymous]

Hi, My name is Jula im the mother of a 21yr old son and this past year has been terrible!!!!! My son has had to be hospitalized 4 times for either wieght loss or infections this last time we had to put a G-tube back in due to the wieght being so less(6ft tall 116) now he wieghts 140 with the g-tube feedings 2 aday. but he doesn't want to do any thing with himself but lay around or go out with the wrong people,,, We try to ask him about school or working again but not right now his what he says. What can we do to help him feel better about himself and get out and make some friends he only has one and he's a user and a smoker and we don't care for him.
Help please thank you Julia

 

[anonymous]

Hi, My name is Jula im the mother of a 21yr old son and this past year has been terrible!!!!! My son has had to be hospitalized 4 times for either wieght loss or infections this last time we had to put a G-tube back in due to the wieght being so less(6ft tall 116) now he wieghts 140 with the g-tube feedings 2 aday. but he doesn't want to do any thing with himself but lay around or go out with the wrong people,,, We try to ask him about school or working again but not right now his what he says. What can we do to help him feel better about himself and get out and make some friends he only has one and he's a user and a smoker and we don't care for him.
Help please thank you Julia

 

[thelizardqueen]

I'm not sure what advice I can give you, but I did at one point go through a rebellious phase. I socially smoked for a bit, and loved going to the bars all the time. For me anyway, I just reached a point where I realized that this sort of attitude is bad for me. I think almost every person with CF goes through this sort of behavior, where they become depressed. Have you tried talking to him about why he doesn't want to go to school or work? Maybe he needs to talk to a counsellor of some sort maybe?

 

[thelizardqueen]

I'm not sure what advice I can give you, but I did at one point go through a rebellious phase. I socially smoked for a bit, and loved going to the bars all the time. For me anyway, I just reached a point where I realized that this sort of attitude is bad for me. I think almost every person with CF goes through this sort of behavior, where they become depressed. Have you tried talking to him about why he doesn't want to go to school or work? Maybe he needs to talk to a counsellor of some sort maybe?

 

[Faust]

Yeah he is VERY bummed out. He thinks his life really sucks, and doesn't see any point in doing anything positive because of apparent impending short longevity. Don't know what else to say really, you can talk to a youngster going through this till you are blue in the face, he either has to learn that it's best to change and be positive, or fall deeper into apathy and that's not good.

 

[Faust]

Yeah he is VERY bummed out. He thinks his life really sucks, and doesn't see any point in doing anything positive because of apparent impending short longevity. Don't know what else to say really, you can talk to a youngster going through this till you are blue in the face, he either has to learn that it's best to change and be positive, or fall deeper into apathy and that's not good.

 

[anonymous]

This behaviour is common in adolescents with CF but your son is 21? Wow sounds like he needs to grow up now and accept that he is alive and needs to do something with it. Explain to him it could always be worth and if he is well enough he should take advantage and find something to do with his life wither its working or finding a healthy hobby. Personally Id like to kick his butt for you but i went through a similiar phase but it didnt last long cuz i realized i was only hurting myself and now i regret it. Im not waiting for new lungs and liver. I wish i could have those years back where i was well enough to go out with my friends. sorry i cant be of much more help.

Kristy
23/ pre lung and liver/cfrd

 

[anonymous]

This behaviour is common in adolescents with CF but your son is 21? Wow sounds like he needs to grow up now and accept that he is alive and needs to do something with it. Explain to him it could always be worth and if he is well enough he should take advantage and find something to do with his life wither its working or finding a healthy hobby. Personally Id like to kick his butt for you but i went through a similiar phase but it didnt last long cuz i realized i was only hurting myself and now i regret it. Im not waiting for new lungs and liver. I wish i could have those years back where i was well enough to go out with my friends. sorry i cant be of much more help.

Kristy
23/ pre lung and liver/cfrd

 

[anonymous]

Have you tried antidepressents? If he's clinically depressed, all the talking and "butt-kicking" will not help, only make things worse. I know with HIPPA laws his drs can't talk to YOU but that doesn't stop YOU from talking to them. Tell them you think he's depressed, go into great detail why and then make an appt for him to see them. IF they're good drs, they'll take your concerns seriously and know the right questions to ask your ds to get him the help he needs. Good luck!!

 

[anonymous]

Have you tried antidepressents? If he's clinically depressed, all the talking and "butt-kicking" will not help, only make things worse. I know with HIPPA laws his drs can't talk to YOU but that doesn't stop YOU from talking to them. Tell them you think he's depressed, go into great detail why and then make an appt for him to see them. IF they're good drs, they'll take your concerns seriously and know the right questions to ask your ds to get him the help he needs. Good luck!!