fondreflections
New member
If you haven't already figured it out, I'm back to trying but somewhat passively.
Allow me to back up a few months...
I didn't tell any of you back then, but I came off the pill in mid-October. I was on it for nearly 3 months. It was competely by accident, though. We had the kids placed October 7th. Things were nutty to say the least. Somehow, I managed to forget to take them 3 days in a row, and I hadn't even thought about them until I started a period...When I called my doctor, he told me that I now had to let the period run it's course and restart when it was over. It also happened to be the time that I needed to send away for refills (3-month supply). I didn't have anymore on hand. I refused to go to Walmart and pay $40.00 for one month instead of $40.00 for 3-months with my mail order. I wouldn't have the mail order in time since I only had about 1 week...So that is how it ended.
There were many times, though, that I wanted to pitch them in the trash can during those 3 months. I was spotting to bleeding nearly daily, got 2 massive yeast infections, and had massive hot flashes. My GYN doctor was going to place me on estrogen supplements in addition to the pill because my hormones were off. It was getting so involved...It wasn't worth it. The only reason I went on the pill was so I wouldn't have to deal with heavy, crampy cycles. In essence, I traded some problems for others...
Fast forward to day...I have been off of them now for 3 months and am having some problems. Again, it's the left ovary, and I probably have a large cyst. This really readdresses the questions of the PCOS diagnosis. My periods are clockwork, and everything else seems to be okay. However, I am having some pressure/pain while trying to pee, pressure/pain in general, and massive bloating. The right ovary is fine like always.
I am debating calling my OB/GYN doctor. I know I probably should, but I really don't want to be judged...I'm not good at handling such negative feedback in the child care arena. For example, I saw him back in late September when I was having the pill issues. I told him that we were looking into foster care. He said (straight out) that he didn't think it was a good idea. That two children would be too much. AND THE KICKER...That you know it really isn't a good idea for CF patients to have any children. He was more than happy to throw my on the pill after my May laparscopy.
Why am I still seeing him??? Well, he is one of the best GYN doctors in the area. He was the ONLY ONE that would perform a laparscopy on me post the 4 feet of colon removed (12-years-ago) and post the burst appendix (13-years-ago). The infertility clinics were ever so quick to push IVF because of POSSIBLE SCAR TISSUE when nothing was even there. THIS GYN DOCTOR IS GOOD, REALLY GOOD. However, he has a very dry personality, and I often find any conversation with him uncomfortable. I hate when I have to talk with him, honestly. Even Jake said that he is 'weird'...
I have to get a 2-hour glucose test in the next week and would like to maybe get a FSH/LH, testerone, and whatever other PCOS levels are checkedd through bloodwork. I also would like to start Metformin again. Honestly, I think it's probably the ONLY chance I have. It takes about 2-3 months of turnaround, but that is fine. Regardless, I am having problems...
I'm also not in any hurry to rush into anything. I've been there and done that. What I got was a nightmare, quite honestly. I only want 1 child and don't want to deal with the headaches of the foster care system EVER, EVER, EVER AGAIN. I fully understand that parenting is 24/7. I believe that I can handle that. What I couldn't handle were the extent of emotional, physical, developmental, and behavioral issues inflicted upon TWO young children. The system then intensives those issues. Even now, our foster care ageny is calling us once a week. We told them that we are 'done', but they don't want to let us go. They helped put me into the situation. I really don't have anything to say to them.
Even still, I really yearn to be pregnant. Sadly, there is only one way to experience that.
I truely believe that IF I can get the PCOS under better control, I may have a chance. I have modified my diet but think that Metformin will also be needed because some of the foods that tick off PCOS are needed for weight gain like milk. Our dietary needs are in conflict with a PCOS-safe diet.
Well, I guess I just needs lots of hugs and advice. I'm sorry to make this so long, but at least I got my feelings out on the table. It probably wouldn't hurt to have more balls either when talking with my GYN, but I have never been good with that...
Allow me to back up a few months...
I didn't tell any of you back then, but I came off the pill in mid-October. I was on it for nearly 3 months. It was competely by accident, though. We had the kids placed October 7th. Things were nutty to say the least. Somehow, I managed to forget to take them 3 days in a row, and I hadn't even thought about them until I started a period...When I called my doctor, he told me that I now had to let the period run it's course and restart when it was over. It also happened to be the time that I needed to send away for refills (3-month supply). I didn't have anymore on hand. I refused to go to Walmart and pay $40.00 for one month instead of $40.00 for 3-months with my mail order. I wouldn't have the mail order in time since I only had about 1 week...So that is how it ended.
There were many times, though, that I wanted to pitch them in the trash can during those 3 months. I was spotting to bleeding nearly daily, got 2 massive yeast infections, and had massive hot flashes. My GYN doctor was going to place me on estrogen supplements in addition to the pill because my hormones were off. It was getting so involved...It wasn't worth it. The only reason I went on the pill was so I wouldn't have to deal with heavy, crampy cycles. In essence, I traded some problems for others...
Fast forward to day...I have been off of them now for 3 months and am having some problems. Again, it's the left ovary, and I probably have a large cyst. This really readdresses the questions of the PCOS diagnosis. My periods are clockwork, and everything else seems to be okay. However, I am having some pressure/pain while trying to pee, pressure/pain in general, and massive bloating. The right ovary is fine like always.
I am debating calling my OB/GYN doctor. I know I probably should, but I really don't want to be judged...I'm not good at handling such negative feedback in the child care arena. For example, I saw him back in late September when I was having the pill issues. I told him that we were looking into foster care. He said (straight out) that he didn't think it was a good idea. That two children would be too much. AND THE KICKER...That you know it really isn't a good idea for CF patients to have any children. He was more than happy to throw my on the pill after my May laparscopy.
Why am I still seeing him??? Well, he is one of the best GYN doctors in the area. He was the ONLY ONE that would perform a laparscopy on me post the 4 feet of colon removed (12-years-ago) and post the burst appendix (13-years-ago). The infertility clinics were ever so quick to push IVF because of POSSIBLE SCAR TISSUE when nothing was even there. THIS GYN DOCTOR IS GOOD, REALLY GOOD. However, he has a very dry personality, and I often find any conversation with him uncomfortable. I hate when I have to talk with him, honestly. Even Jake said that he is 'weird'...
I have to get a 2-hour glucose test in the next week and would like to maybe get a FSH/LH, testerone, and whatever other PCOS levels are checkedd through bloodwork. I also would like to start Metformin again. Honestly, I think it's probably the ONLY chance I have. It takes about 2-3 months of turnaround, but that is fine. Regardless, I am having problems...
I'm also not in any hurry to rush into anything. I've been there and done that. What I got was a nightmare, quite honestly. I only want 1 child and don't want to deal with the headaches of the foster care system EVER, EVER, EVER AGAIN. I fully understand that parenting is 24/7. I believe that I can handle that. What I couldn't handle were the extent of emotional, physical, developmental, and behavioral issues inflicted upon TWO young children. The system then intensives those issues. Even now, our foster care ageny is calling us once a week. We told them that we are 'done', but they don't want to let us go. They helped put me into the situation. I really don't have anything to say to them.
Even still, I really yearn to be pregnant. Sadly, there is only one way to experience that.
I truely believe that IF I can get the PCOS under better control, I may have a chance. I have modified my diet but think that Metformin will also be needed because some of the foods that tick off PCOS are needed for weight gain like milk. Our dietary needs are in conflict with a PCOS-safe diet.
Well, I guess I just needs lots of hugs and advice. I'm sorry to make this so long, but at least I got my feelings out on the table. It probably wouldn't hurt to have more balls either when talking with my GYN, but I have never been good with that...