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Mum's Drinking

Grl22

New member
I am almost 23 and brouse this site alot don't really say much just sit back and read. But tonight i had to go to my mum's as ahe was extreamly drunk and my brothers didn't know what to do.
She is a good mum she would go to the end of the earth for us kids but she gets really depressed and turns to alchol and looses control of every thing. tonight she told me she has had enough of life (she says this oftern but meaninglessly) the way she said it tonight really scared me tho. All us kids are grown up the youngest two are 17, and 15 but then there is a big gap and my baby brother Zhai (diff father) she said we don't need her and Zhai has us, she has life insurance and funeral cover and all that so she thinks it will benifit us.
I have no idea what i can do to help her! i have asked her to talk to some one, begged her to not use the bottle as an escape and threatened taking Zhai but she just says she is her and she always fights on. tho i am glad she fights on i would rather her do something about it because i don't want her to just fight on i want her to have some enjoyment in her days.
Her drinking is only ever on the weekend and some times she will go months with out but then some thing will happen and we are back at the start.
Not really sure why im posting this i guess it is all getting to hard to handel and the seriousness and sadness in her face tonight SCARED me!!
 

Grl22

New member
I am almost 23 and brouse this site alot don't really say much just sit back and read. But tonight i had to go to my mum's as ahe was extreamly drunk and my brothers didn't know what to do.
She is a good mum she would go to the end of the earth for us kids but she gets really depressed and turns to alchol and looses control of every thing. tonight she told me she has had enough of life (she says this oftern but meaninglessly) the way she said it tonight really scared me tho. All us kids are grown up the youngest two are 17, and 15 but then there is a big gap and my baby brother Zhai (diff father) she said we don't need her and Zhai has us, she has life insurance and funeral cover and all that so she thinks it will benifit us.
I have no idea what i can do to help her! i have asked her to talk to some one, begged her to not use the bottle as an escape and threatened taking Zhai but she just says she is her and she always fights on. tho i am glad she fights on i would rather her do something about it because i don't want her to just fight on i want her to have some enjoyment in her days.
Her drinking is only ever on the weekend and some times she will go months with out but then some thing will happen and we are back at the start.
Not really sure why im posting this i guess it is all getting to hard to handel and the seriousness and sadness in her face tonight SCARED me!!
 

Grl22

New member
I am almost 23 and brouse this site alot don't really say much just sit back and read. But tonight i had to go to my mum's as ahe was extreamly drunk and my brothers didn't know what to do.
She is a good mum she would go to the end of the earth for us kids but she gets really depressed and turns to alchol and looses control of every thing. tonight she told me she has had enough of life (she says this oftern but meaninglessly) the way she said it tonight really scared me tho. All us kids are grown up the youngest two are 17, and 15 but then there is a big gap and my baby brother Zhai (diff father) she said we don't need her and Zhai has us, she has life insurance and funeral cover and all that so she thinks it will benifit us.
I have no idea what i can do to help her! i have asked her to talk to some one, begged her to not use the bottle as an escape and threatened taking Zhai but she just says she is her and she always fights on. tho i am glad she fights on i would rather her do something about it because i don't want her to just fight on i want her to have some enjoyment in her days.
Her drinking is only ever on the weekend and some times she will go months with out but then some thing will happen and we are back at the start.
Not really sure why im posting this i guess it is all getting to hard to handel and the seriousness and sadness in her face tonight SCARED me!!
 

LisaV

New member
My mom used to do this. I never had any help with this until I was in my 30s and out of the house. What I wish someone had said to me when I was living at home was "join Alanon" (see <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.alanon.com">http://www.alanon.com</a> ) and if since you are scared she might really hurt herself right now "call Her doctor and YOUR doctor (both) and let them know what you're seeing and ask for help". This is way more than kids should have to handle all by themselves (even if the kid is 23).

Keeping you in my heart.
PM me if you want to.
 

LisaV

New member
My mom used to do this. I never had any help with this until I was in my 30s and out of the house. What I wish someone had said to me when I was living at home was "join Alanon" (see <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.alanon.com">http://www.alanon.com</a> ) and if since you are scared she might really hurt herself right now "call Her doctor and YOUR doctor (both) and let them know what you're seeing and ask for help". This is way more than kids should have to handle all by themselves (even if the kid is 23).

Keeping you in my heart.
PM me if you want to.
 

LisaV

New member
My mom used to do this. I never had any help with this until I was in my 30s and out of the house. What I wish someone had said to me when I was living at home was "join Alanon" (see <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.alanon.com">http://www.alanon.com</a> ) and if since you are scared she might really hurt herself right now "call Her doctor and YOUR doctor (both) and let them know what you're seeing and ask for help". This is way more than kids should have to handle all by themselves (even if the kid is 23).

Keeping you in my heart.
PM me if you want to.
 

Uli

New member
I think life insurance will not pay, if somebody kills himself. So as she obviously brought this point up to you, maybe you should tell her that; maybe it helps changing her mind...

Uli,44,Germany
 

Uli

New member
I think life insurance will not pay, if somebody kills himself. So as she obviously brought this point up to you, maybe you should tell her that; maybe it helps changing her mind...

Uli,44,Germany
 

Uli

New member
I think life insurance will not pay, if somebody kills himself. So as she obviously brought this point up to you, maybe you should tell her that; maybe it helps changing her mind...

Uli,44,Germany
 

CowTown

New member
I would suggest an intervention. Call AA and ask who to talk to about organizing an intervention. This would ential gathering some of her friends and family to surprise her in a group meeting where arrangements would probably already be made for her to go to rehab that night, or close to it. I think all you can do is tell her how much you care and love her, ask her to stop and explain to her how it is affecting you and your family, etc......then it's all on her - unfortunately. If she refuses on her own, then refuses an intervention, then at least you know you've done all <b>you</b> can do to help. Alcoholics have a tough time stopping on their own and for good. I wish you the best!

Just a thought so it doesn't continue to eat you up over the coming years (if that is what it's doing). She is the only person who can change this behavior. If she doesn't change, just know that it is not your fault and it will continue to be up to her to make the change -- just like anything in life, it's our own responsibility. <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">

Good luck!

You can PM me if you want.
 

CowTown

New member
I would suggest an intervention. Call AA and ask who to talk to about organizing an intervention. This would ential gathering some of her friends and family to surprise her in a group meeting where arrangements would probably already be made for her to go to rehab that night, or close to it. I think all you can do is tell her how much you care and love her, ask her to stop and explain to her how it is affecting you and your family, etc......then it's all on her - unfortunately. If she refuses on her own, then refuses an intervention, then at least you know you've done all <b>you</b> can do to help. Alcoholics have a tough time stopping on their own and for good. I wish you the best!

Just a thought so it doesn't continue to eat you up over the coming years (if that is what it's doing). She is the only person who can change this behavior. If she doesn't change, just know that it is not your fault and it will continue to be up to her to make the change -- just like anything in life, it's our own responsibility. <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">

Good luck!

You can PM me if you want.
 

CowTown

New member
I would suggest an intervention. Call AA and ask who to talk to about organizing an intervention. This would ential gathering some of her friends and family to surprise her in a group meeting where arrangements would probably already be made for her to go to rehab that night, or close to it. I think all you can do is tell her how much you care and love her, ask her to stop and explain to her how it is affecting you and your family, etc......then it's all on her - unfortunately. If she refuses on her own, then refuses an intervention, then at least you know you've done all <b>you</b> can do to help. Alcoholics have a tough time stopping on their own and for good. I wish you the best!

Just a thought so it doesn't continue to eat you up over the coming years (if that is what it's doing). She is the only person who can change this behavior. If she doesn't change, just know that it is not your fault and it will continue to be up to her to make the change -- just like anything in life, it's our own responsibility. <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">

Good luck!

You can PM me if you want.
 
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