PLEASE help. REALLY needed life threatening advice needed (long read)

[luke]

Sean,

To answer one of your questions, I used a professional career counselor when I was finishing my MBA. They taught some resume things, worked on interview skills and were a sounding board for ideas. Their program really focused on networking and tapping the "unpublished" job market but just giving me advise was worth the time and money. I spent $1350 for some (including myself) is a lot of money, but in the end my investment paid off and not to mention was tax deductible.

I will give you the same advise I have recently given my brother who is finishing his MBA and looking for "better" employment. It is hard to find a good job. It takes a lot of patience and many times you have to settle into a job that is not ideal currently to get your ideal job 2 years from now. In my situation I interviewed for a job I really didn't want but "talked" my way into a management position in the interview. I took a smaller pay increase than I wanted in exchange for opportunity. Now 2 years later...I am over the entire state for my company and literally made twice as much than I did in my previous job. My recommendation is maybe take a lesser paying security job to get experience, everyone wants experienced help. Work there until you get to know someone, anyone...a boss, an owner, another person in the industry who will be able to recognize your skill sets and give you the opportunity you deserve. And finally never tell a possible employer that you have CF. No one wants to hire someone who is going to cost them hundreds of thousands of dollars in health costs.


Good Luck,


Luke

 

[luke]

Sean,

To answer one of your questions, I used a professional career counselor when I was finishing my MBA. They taught some resume things, worked on interview skills and were a sounding board for ideas. Their program really focused on networking and tapping the "unpublished" job market but just giving me advise was worth the time and money. I spent $1350 for some (including myself) is a lot of money, but in the end my investment paid off and not to mention was tax deductible.

I will give you the same advise I have recently given my brother who is finishing his MBA and looking for "better" employment. It is hard to find a good job. It takes a lot of patience and many times you have to settle into a job that is not ideal currently to get your ideal job 2 years from now. In my situation I interviewed for a job I really didn't want but "talked" my way into a management position in the interview. I took a smaller pay increase than I wanted in exchange for opportunity. Now 2 years later...I am over the entire state for my company and literally made twice as much than I did in my previous job. My recommendation is maybe take a lesser paying security job to get experience, everyone wants experienced help. Work there until you get to know someone, anyone...a boss, an owner, another person in the industry who will be able to recognize your skill sets and give you the opportunity you deserve. And finally never tell a possible employer that you have CF. No one wants to hire someone who is going to cost them hundreds of thousands of dollars in health costs.


Good Luck,


Luke

 

[anonymous]

It is illegal for an interviewer to ask you why you were on disability. I will get you some more info on what is & is not legal to be asked at an interview. Just like they can't ask you what religion you practice or how old you are.

 

[anonymous]

It is illegal for an interviewer to ask you why you were on disability. I will get you some more info on what is & is not legal to be asked at an interview. Just like they can't ask you what religion you practice or how old you are.

 

[wallflower]

I think Diana is totally right - you should look at writing - you have a very easy writing style that is captivating. You could write a contraversial book on the use of oils in cf <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Something for you to consider to use as job experience and not jepordize your home arrangement; my boyfriend is on the police reserves in the city he lives in. It is a volunteer position, and you don't get to carry a gun, but you get the other experiences of being a cop. If you could find something like that where you live, you would be surprised at the connections you make (and the inside skinny on job openings).

It took me a long time to find the job I have now (which I love), and best advice I can give you is to join any activities or groups that relate to your job goals (networking is 95% of getting a job), and do reverse interviewing. I did this at a couple of places, and it gives great feedback on how you should 'promote' yourself. It's also another great networking opportunity. The key to reverse interviewing, is to not indicate that you are looking for a job with that company (but hoping that they will offer you one once your done). I would ask questions like, what sets your company apart from the competition, what are the top qualities that your staff posess, how do you find new employees (ads, inside promotion, recommendations, temps, staffing agencies...).

I agree that you shouldn't mention cf until after your hired - people want to know that your a sturdy long term addition. The people I work with know that I have cf, but I waited to share it with anyone until after I had a chance to prove myself in the job.

Good luck Sean - and be patient, it does take a while, but it will be worth it!

 

[wallflower]

I think Diana is totally right - you should look at writing - you have a very easy writing style that is captivating. You could write a contraversial book on the use of oils in cf <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Something for you to consider to use as job experience and not jepordize your home arrangement; my boyfriend is on the police reserves in the city he lives in. It is a volunteer position, and you don't get to carry a gun, but you get the other experiences of being a cop. If you could find something like that where you live, you would be surprised at the connections you make (and the inside skinny on job openings).

It took me a long time to find the job I have now (which I love), and best advice I can give you is to join any activities or groups that relate to your job goals (networking is 95% of getting a job), and do reverse interviewing. I did this at a couple of places, and it gives great feedback on how you should 'promote' yourself. It's also another great networking opportunity. The key to reverse interviewing, is to not indicate that you are looking for a job with that company (but hoping that they will offer you one once your done). I would ask questions like, what sets your company apart from the competition, what are the top qualities that your staff posess, how do you find new employees (ads, inside promotion, recommendations, temps, staffing agencies...).

I agree that you shouldn't mention cf until after your hired - people want to know that your a sturdy long term addition. The people I work with know that I have cf, but I waited to share it with anyone until after I had a chance to prove myself in the job.

Good luck Sean - and be patient, it does take a while, but it will be worth it!

 

[Bengalsfan]

For someone who is majoring in english/lit......you should definitely get that book out there!! I'd buy it in a heartbeat too. Other than that I'm afraid I don't have much advice. Jeremy's been on disability since we met. He's tried a few jobs, but none of them are too kind when it comes to 10 day stays in the hospital or a treatment whenever he needs one....so we just decided when we found out I was having twins that I would work and he would be the stay at home parent. Sorry! Wish I could be of more assistance! LeAndra

 

[Bengalsfan]

For someone who is majoring in english/lit......you should definitely get that book out there!! I'd buy it in a heartbeat too. Other than that I'm afraid I don't have much advice. Jeremy's been on disability since we met. He's tried a few jobs, but none of them are too kind when it comes to 10 day stays in the hospital or a treatment whenever he needs one....so we just decided when we found out I was having twins that I would work and he would be the stay at home parent. Sorry! Wish I could be of more assistance! LeAndra

 

[Faust]

Thanks for the advice guys. Of course anything else from anyone else is always appreciated. After I get my CF checkup taken care of on the 10th of this month i'm going, to figure out where I am healthwise, and to see just how well off I am due to the essential oil useage, I need to make a pretty important decision. Possible professional resume company/career counseling is a great idea, though can't afford anything as steep as what the other guy mentioned. I can't stand just sitting around when I know I could be making 4-20 times the amount of money I receive now via SS. The only scary part is the getting run down aspect of working. When I did my training for my G security license, it was 3 days back to back of basically 3 hours of sleep * 2, long drives back and forth, and just general totaly exhaustion. That is what put me in the hospital last time. I need to figure out some ways to pull a Jedi Mind F**k on the next interviewer when it comes to time gaps, disability, etc. I guess a flat out response of "I'm sorry but I feel that's a very personal question, and I don't feel comfortable answering that" would flag my data for the trash can. That seems to be where i'm stuck right now. Any other suggestions on how to discuss those issues without being automatically not considered for the position?

 

[Faust]

Thanks for the advice guys. Of course anything else from anyone else is always appreciated. After I get my CF checkup taken care of on the 10th of this month i'm going, to figure out where I am healthwise, and to see just how well off I am due to the essential oil useage, I need to make a pretty important decision. Possible professional resume company/career counseling is a great idea, though can't afford anything as steep as what the other guy mentioned. I can't stand just sitting around when I know I could be making 4-20 times the amount of money I receive now via SS. The only scary part is the getting run down aspect of working. When I did my training for my G security license, it was 3 days back to back of basically 3 hours of sleep * 2, long drives back and forth, and just general totaly exhaustion. That is what put me in the hospital last time. I need to figure out some ways to pull a Jedi Mind F**k on the next interviewer when it comes to time gaps, disability, etc. I guess a flat out response of "I'm sorry but I feel that's a very personal question, and I don't feel comfortable answering that" would flag my data for the trash can. That seems to be where i'm stuck right now. Any other suggestions on how to discuss those issues without being automatically not considered for the position?

 

[65rosessamurai]

Just (possibly) one last point to make.
First, you are applying for a job related to the law. And, if it is certain your rights had been broken in the last interview, study up what laws are available for discrimination, etc., and prepare yourself for the next interview. If you state that "under such and such a law, I don't have to disclose that MUCH information", they can't penalize you for doing "extra" homework, now, could they?? (basically, know your rights before the next interview.)
A thought came to mind, which also helped me. Doesn't the school you graduated from have a job search and counseling division available?? I had that for me, and I graduated from a Community College.

 

[65rosessamurai]

Just (possibly) one last point to make.
First, you are applying for a job related to the law. And, if it is certain your rights had been broken in the last interview, study up what laws are available for discrimination, etc., and prepare yourself for the next interview. If you state that "under such and such a law, I don't have to disclose that MUCH information", they can't penalize you for doing "extra" homework, now, could they?? (basically, know your rights before the next interview.)
A thought came to mind, which also helped me. Doesn't the school you graduated from have a job search and counseling division available?? I had that for me, and I graduated from a Community College.

 

[Prussian]

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[Prussian]

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[skh]

Sean, you have been a great source of encouragement for me. I wish you well in your job search. Like someone else mentioned life isn't about money but about living. Although, it seems to always come back to money doesn't it? You seem like you have so much potential I would hate to see that wasted. If you ever get around to writing a book I too would buy it in a heartbeat! I agree with the thought about being a comedian or comedy writer. What ever you decide my family and I wish you the best.

Sue

 

[skh]

Sean, you have been a great source of encouragement for me. I wish you well in your job search. Like someone else mentioned life isn't about money but about living. Although, it seems to always come back to money doesn't it? You seem like you have so much potential I would hate to see that wasted. If you ever get around to writing a book I too would buy it in a heartbeat! I agree with the thought about being a comedian or comedy writer. What ever you decide my family and I wish you the best.

Sue

 

[EnergyGal]

If you are receiving SS and you show them that you can work you will of course loose your benefits. I say be careful because once you lose your benefits you are going to be in deep trouble. I would not work unless you can get good benefits and a decent amount of money. Nothing in life is going to look perfect when you start out but if you are very healthy Cf and you can work a job that can make you more money than disability then I say go for it but be prepared for everything. Check out the domestic partner laws in your area as having your fiance' part of your home sounds bogus to me. I received benefits from my husband before we were married under the domestic partner in the state of florida and we both were renting. I had to pay a lot of money for insurance. So make sure your new job will give you enough to risk it all. IF you cannot find a job that will be worth your risks so to speak then be proud that you have healthy CF and volunteer somewhere but getting out of the house is important on a regular basis. I think about some kind of teen counseling as you have a lot of feeling for children who have disabilities. Good Luck

 

[EnergyGal]

If you are receiving SS and you show them that you can work you will of course loose your benefits. I say be careful because once you lose your benefits you are going to be in deep trouble. I would not work unless you can get good benefits and a decent amount of money. Nothing in life is going to look perfect when you start out but if you are very healthy Cf and you can work a job that can make you more money than disability then I say go for it but be prepared for everything. Check out the domestic partner laws in your area as having your fiance' part of your home sounds bogus to me. I received benefits from my husband before we were married under the domestic partner in the state of florida and we both were renting. I had to pay a lot of money for insurance. So make sure your new job will give you enough to risk it all. IF you cannot find a job that will be worth your risks so to speak then be proud that you have healthy CF and volunteer somewhere but getting out of the house is important on a regular basis. I think about some kind of teen counseling as you have a lot of feeling for children who have disabilities. Good Luck

 

[JazzysMom]

I dont get the whole put her name on the deed thing. What if there wasnt a house? I dont see how legally they can ask that! This is definitely something that needs to be addressed since Domestic Partner coverage is becoming more widely available! As for the rest of our dilmema...I prefer not to comment too much. I basically think you are limiting yourself because you have in your head what your want tho I dont ??? the need since $$ is a big facture with CF. It just reminds me of a kid starting out in the work force expecting top pay when they dont have experience yet. The only thing for you is that you are not a kid so to explain that time frame with no experience becomes an issue. Sorry I dont have any answers expect that I think somehow you are missing something. Even if its doing something you dispise in the meantime. I just cant get past certain facts to help you further. Sorry!

 

[JazzysMom]

I dont get the whole put her name on the deed thing. What if there wasnt a house? I dont see how legally they can ask that! This is definitely something that needs to be addressed since Domestic Partner coverage is becoming more widely available! As for the rest of our dilmema...I prefer not to comment too much. I basically think you are limiting yourself because you have in your head what your want tho I dont ??? the need since $$ is a big facture with CF. It just reminds me of a kid starting out in the work force expecting top pay when they dont have experience yet. The only thing for you is that you are not a kid so to explain that time frame with no experience becomes an issue. Sorry I dont have any answers expect that I think somehow you are missing something. Even if its doing something you dispise in the meantime. I just cant get past certain facts to help you further. Sorry!