Dating someone with CF.

[anonymous]

I am a female with CF and was wondering if anyone on this site had any difficulties with a significant other coming to terms with the fact that you have CF and if so how did you handle it? Did u have any issues in regards to the future i.e kids etc....

any feedback would be appreciated.

-D <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[anonymous]

I am a female with CF and was wondering if anyone on this site had any difficulties with a significant other coming to terms with the fact that you have CF and if so how did you handle it? Did u have any issues in regards to the future i.e kids etc....

any feedback would be appreciated.

-D <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[AbsintheSorrow]

My Mike has comes to terms with the whole CF deal. We've been together a year, 2 months and change now. So he understands the severity and the fact that I can't have kids (I physically cannot for unrelated reasons, though it would've been harder based on the CF alone anyway), and that I'll probably be gone quite a bit before he is. However, he supports me in everything I do. He goes with me to my hospital appointments, my PFTs. He stays in the hospital with me, sleeping on a chair (or the floor!) whenever I'm admitted. He helps me with my meds, and he's learned how to beat my back correctly for therapy, so he does that when I need as well. Basically, he knows everything that's involved with CF, and it upsets him (which is no surprise, heh), but he constantly supports me nonetheless.

 

[AbsintheSorrow]

My Mike has comes to terms with the whole CF deal. We've been together a year, 2 months and change now. So he understands the severity and the fact that I can't have kids (I physically cannot for unrelated reasons, though it would've been harder based on the CF alone anyway), and that I'll probably be gone quite a bit before he is. However, he supports me in everything I do. He goes with me to my hospital appointments, my PFTs. He stays in the hospital with me, sleeping on a chair (or the floor!) whenever I'm admitted. He helps me with my meds, and he's learned how to beat my back correctly for therapy, so he does that when I need as well. Basically, he knows everything that's involved with CF, and it upsets him (which is no surprise, heh), but he constantly supports me nonetheless.

 

[ClashPunk82]

My boyfriend Kevin is awesome. He knew I had CF before I told him. I would always cough around him when we were just friends and he said wow you cough a lot and I said long story I'll yell you another time. Then he asked do you have CF? I was shocked I couldn't believe he knew what that was. Turns out a friend of his had it so he knew all about it. He is great though. The CF has never bothered him. He has always been supportive and there for me. We have been together for almost 4 years now so hopefully we will get married soon. At 1st I used to tell him he should leave and find anothergirl but he always told me to shut up! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> He is so fine with everything that goes with CF and he doesn't mind about not having children. I'm so lucky I found a guy like him.

Nicole 22 CF

 

[ClashPunk82]

My boyfriend Kevin is awesome. He knew I had CF before I told him. I would always cough around him when we were just friends and he said wow you cough a lot and I said long story I'll yell you another time. Then he asked do you have CF? I was shocked I couldn't believe he knew what that was. Turns out a friend of his had it so he knew all about it. He is great though. The CF has never bothered him. He has always been supportive and there for me. We have been together for almost 4 years now so hopefully we will get married soon. At 1st I used to tell him he should leave and find anothergirl but he always told me to shut up! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> He is so fine with everything that goes with CF and he doesn't mind about not having children. I'm so lucky I found a guy like him.

Nicole 22 CF

 

[AbsintheSorrow]

lol Nicole I did the same thing with Mike... "Maybe you should find a healthy girl, one who can have your kids, and live longer..." and he tells me the same thing. "Shut up, I know what I want. I'd rather be with you for 10 years than stop being with you now. I want any time I can get." Haha. I've learned to shut up about it most of the time. <img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">

 

[AbsintheSorrow]

lol Nicole I did the same thing with Mike... "Maybe you should find a healthy girl, one who can have your kids, and live longer..." and he tells me the same thing. "Shut up, I know what I want. I'd rather be with you for 10 years than stop being with you now. I want any time I can get." Haha. I've learned to shut up about it most of the time. <img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">

 

[Emeraldmirror]

My boyfriend Cam is great. He always helps me remember my medications and stuff. We met when we were 15, but he was in love with me since we met, but we didn't start dating until this year (I'm 20 now). He's never had a hard time coming into terms with it. We haven't really decided whether or not to have children. He's been really supportive, and doesn't just ignor the fact that I have it (like my ex did). We don't talk about it all the time, or dwell on it, but he'll aknoweledge it at appropriate times.


Ashley 20w/cf

 

[Emeraldmirror]

My boyfriend Cam is great. He always helps me remember my medications and stuff. We met when we were 15, but he was in love with me since we met, but we didn't start dating until this year (I'm 20 now). He's never had a hard time coming into terms with it. We haven't really decided whether or not to have children. He's been really supportive, and doesn't just ignor the fact that I have it (like my ex did). We don't talk about it all the time, or dwell on it, but he'll aknoweledge it at appropriate times.


Ashley 20w/cf

 

[jenhum]

I have a Mike as well <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">, and I too have done the whole "you deserve to have a healthy girl" thing, and I too have been told to hush up and stop being silly. Mike has actually been a great influence on me, he never lets me miss a treatment or a pill. Sometimes I think he takes better care of me than I take of myself. He knows that physically, I will probably only be able to have one kid, and that's if my numbers stay where they are. He is also planning on getting tested to see if he is a carrier, b/c engagement is something that's coming up pretty soon <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">. I have actually never had a problem with any of my boyfriends accepting my cf, I guess I am just lucky. Or a really good picker <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">.

 

[jenhum]

I have a Mike as well <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">, and I too have done the whole "you deserve to have a healthy girl" thing, and I too have been told to hush up and stop being silly. Mike has actually been a great influence on me, he never lets me miss a treatment or a pill. Sometimes I think he takes better care of me than I take of myself. He knows that physically, I will probably only be able to have one kid, and that's if my numbers stay where they are. He is also planning on getting tested to see if he is a carrier, b/c engagement is something that's coming up pretty soon <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">. I have actually never had a problem with any of my boyfriends accepting my cf, I guess I am just lucky. Or a really good picker <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">.

 

[supermanfan]

I've been married now for 10 years olmost 11. When John and I met I was somewhat healthy, and one of my firends had a transplant, which of course left me with great expectations for when the time came for me.. I told John I had CF, and he talked to his mom about it first because frankly he didn't quite understand it all. She knew something of it, and I of course also helped educate him. When I started going to the hospital he would come after work, and stay the night with me in my room. After dateing for a while he proposed to me after he had to take me to the hospital because I had an increadibly high feaver. We planned a get away weekend, which the hospital trip somewhat ruined it... then I was released (feaver was down within 5 hours) we went back to our cottage where we were staying, and he got dressed (unknown to me until he came out of the bathroom) in his tux, and did the romanticmethod by getting down on one knee. I was shocked. It was Valentines Day. That's why we went away to begin with. Obviously he had planns.. Anyways, it's been wonderfull. I can't imagine how I would have done it without him. :heart:

 

[supermanfan]

I've been married now for 10 years olmost 11. When John and I met I was somewhat healthy, and one of my firends had a transplant, which of course left me with great expectations for when the time came for me.. I told John I had CF, and he talked to his mom about it first because frankly he didn't quite understand it all. She knew something of it, and I of course also helped educate him. When I started going to the hospital he would come after work, and stay the night with me in my room. After dateing for a while he proposed to me after he had to take me to the hospital because I had an increadibly high feaver. We planned a get away weekend, which the hospital trip somewhat ruined it... then I was released (feaver was down within 5 hours) we went back to our cottage where we were staying, and he got dressed (unknown to me until he came out of the bathroom) in his tux, and did the romanticmethod by getting down on one knee. I was shocked. It was Valentines Day. That's why we went away to begin with. Obviously he had planns.. Anyways, it's been wonderfull. I can't imagine how I would have done it without him. :heart:

 

[anonymous]

ah thats so sweet gettting into the tux. that sounded sooooo romantic.
My boyfriend has cf and to be honest i went through a stage where i couldn't handle the fact that i'm not going to have the love of my life with me forever, but i've gottten over that now thank god cos theres no point in dwelling on it. It doesn't bother me AT ALL that he has cf. We're going out 2 and a half years and hes the best thing thats ever happened to me. I've gotten the you should go find someone else thats healthy(at the start) but i couldn't. So the partners that don't have cf i guess we just deal with it and get on with it.
I've more in my head that i want to say but its just not coming out right. lol.

 

[anonymous]

ah thats so sweet gettting into the tux. that sounded sooooo romantic.
My boyfriend has cf and to be honest i went through a stage where i couldn't handle the fact that i'm not going to have the love of my life with me forever, but i've gottten over that now thank god cos theres no point in dwelling on it. It doesn't bother me AT ALL that he has cf. We're going out 2 and a half years and hes the best thing thats ever happened to me. I've gotten the you should go find someone else thats healthy(at the start) but i couldn't. So the partners that don't have cf i guess we just deal with it and get on with it.
I've more in my head that i want to say but its just not coming out right. lol.

 

[anonymous]

My boyfriend has CF and I too went through the "I am selfish for wanting you to stay with me?" phase, which seems to be pretty much over for now. I knew of the CF way before we started dating and it honestly never bothered me, I figured if you love the guy why should it matter right? It took a little convincing for my parents (especially my mother), but once they got to know him all the concerns went away. We had wondeful family talk about CF, and my boyfriend explaining his 'special case' to my parents, which helped a great deal as coming from me the same information seemed to have less impact.

I wouldn't trade him for the world and there is no point in dwelling on the CF because it's never going to go away so the best is to accept it and deal with it (I'm not saying it's easy but it can be done, even if it does get harder at times)

 

[anonymous]

My boyfriend has CF and I too went through the "I am selfish for wanting you to stay with me?" phase, which seems to be pretty much over for now. I knew of the CF way before we started dating and it honestly never bothered me, I figured if you love the guy why should it matter right? It took a little convincing for my parents (especially my mother), but once they got to know him all the concerns went away. We had wondeful family talk about CF, and my boyfriend explaining his 'special case' to my parents, which helped a great deal as coming from me the same information seemed to have less impact.

I wouldn't trade him for the world and there is no point in dwelling on the CF because it's never going to go away so the best is to accept it and deal with it (I'm not saying it's easy but it can be done, even if it does get harder at times)

 

[AbsintheSorrow]

That just reminded me of the "in-laws" reaction to the CF, so to speak. When I started dating my Mike, his dad didn't much care about the CF at all (not that he doesn't care, but that he didn't see fit to tell Mike not to date me because of it). His mother, a librarian, decided to bring home books on CF and read them, and encourage Mike to read them. So she knows as much about CF as Mike does, and she loves me anyway. Heehee. <img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">

 

[AbsintheSorrow]

That just reminded me of the "in-laws" reaction to the CF, so to speak. When I started dating my Mike, his dad didn't much care about the CF at all (not that he doesn't care, but that he didn't see fit to tell Mike not to date me because of it). His mother, a librarian, decided to bring home books on CF and read them, and encourage Mike to read them. So she knows as much about CF as Mike does, and she loves me anyway. Heehee. <img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">