One word: EMLA!!! You should not have to feel that kind of pain, especially since your port is so new. After awhile, yeah, scar tissues forms after repeated pokes and you really don't feel it (some still do, so when in doubt, get the cream). You put it on about 30 minutes before it is accessed to make sure it is numb enough. Trust me, you won't feel it much or at all.
Also, why are they having such a tough time getting you accessed? Is it deeper than normal or in weird spot? I feel for you....I made sure that my port would be easy to see, close enough to the surface as well as in a placee where I could do the accessing, I am extremely picky in that department!
Oy, hopefully, that get better as well....that is just nuts that they are havin a hrd time too as far as putting the needle in.
Good luck, let us know how it works out,
GB hugs, Jenn